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Kourtney writes:
"I wanted to post on your site but also didn't want to offend anyone. But I was just looking through another hair sites fb page (HairStyles for Girls) and she must have just recently put up a "egg hairstyle" for Easter. It's really a cute idea...but it got me thinking about the jolly rancher girl that got ripped apart by her teacher for having those in her hair. Whats the deal...its CUTE if little [white] girls wear plastic easter eggs in their hair but its not ok to wear candy at the ends of braids/locs??"
Sorry just had to vent about that!
&
"I just thought it was funny how all the moms were posting pics of the hairstyle and how all the other students and teachers were "loving" the hairstyle but its not ok for *all* girls."
Kourtney makes a great point. I love Adopt A 'Do - Cute Girls Hairstyles and think the Egg Tails hairstyle is adorable. I've had the chance to read comments not only on my blog, but also in forums about the jolly rancher incident and while most people feel like the teacher was wrong for posting the child's hairstyle on her Facebook page, some also think the mother was wrong for giving her child that "ghetto" (their words, not mine) or tacky hairstyle. A select few thought the hairstyle was cute and age appropriate and gave the mother props for allowing her daughter to express herself. So, when little white girls wear a different hairstyle, it's cute. But when little black girls wear a different hairstyle, it's ghetto? O_o Hmm...
Incase you missed the original story, click here.
Thoughts?
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I don't personally think it's appropriate to wear candy in your hair to school. And I personally don't like either the egg hairstyle or the candy hairstyle. I can, however, respect someone's individuality when either hairstyle is worn in an appropriate setting. The candy style I don't feel was appropriate in the school setting. The poster of the egg hairstyle mentioned it would be for an egg hunt, or a family party. That, I could see.
ReplyDeleteEither way, the teacher should not have posted the pic on facebook and she should have kept her opinion to herself (IMO).
@Kelly, thanks for sharing. On Hairstyles for Girls Facebook page a few people mentioned how much their daughters teacher loved the Egg Tails hairstyle so I believe that is what Kourtney is referring to.
ReplyDeletei'm really reaching with this reasoning but it's possible people feel the difference is the ocassion. picture day vs easter. woild you send your child to school dressed like a pumpkin on any day other than halloween? & again this is just me playing devil's advocate...i do think there tends to be a double standard suc+ as back in the day when cornrows became 'accepted'in pop culture once bo derek rocked them..i can't call it
ReplyDeleteI agree w/kelly...not a 'fan' of either style (for my babies)
ReplyDeleteI think i would have talked about both parents for doing that.
ReplyDeleteWell unfortunately, my work has blocked the link to the Egg Tails picture so I can't exactly comment on that aspect, but I do agree with Kelly about the appropriateness of certain hairstyles, regardless of race. I get that the candy hairstyle was the child's idea and the mother (understandably) didn't want to quash the child's sense of individuality. Teaching a child to be proud of him/herself and nurturing self-esteem/individuality is definitely commendable but so is teaching the appropriate/inappropriate times to showcase that uniqueness. I wouldn't think that the candy or egg tail hairstyle is best for school, but I bet either one of those girls could totally rock it out about town, to a birthday party or just for fun.
ReplyDeleteJust my dos pesos ;)
I think both the Jolly Rancher and the Egg Tails hairstyles are very cute, fun, creative and kid appropriate. I'm still having a hard time fully understanding what all the fuss is about, lol. A part of me feels like its this huge deal, especially where the Jolly Rancher hairstyle is concerned, because "we" have a hard time getting past what "we" would have or wouldn't have done with "our" child's hair. These folks stepped outside the box, where's the crime that was committed?
ReplyDeleteI don't think the little girl with the Jolly Ranchers was removing the candies and passing them around the classroom, lol, AND, I don't see those eggs in those tails going anywhere, so again, why are these styles so horribly inappropriate in a school setting? Can we at least get an argument that candies might not be allowed in the classroom? Lol. I think because, again, "we" find a level of embarrassment in it and that tends to be a deep rooted issue going back to racism and that old respectability argument (ghetto vs proper, forward north vs backwards south, loud colors vs... you get the picture, lol)
I don't really like either style, but I a) wouldn't describe either one as 'ghetto', no matter the colour of the child and b) would say nothing if I couldn't say anything nice and respect that people have different tastes and the right to do what they want to their hair.
ReplyDeleteHello Everyone! As parents I believe that we should foster our children's individuality. Confidence in self-expression molds secure adults that are unafraid to be themselves. I allow my children to assist me in the way they want to look, but as the "rational" adult I create boundaries based on what their dad and I deem appropriate. I admire the Smith's for allowing their daughter Willow to "whip her hair" how she feels. We have to learn to give a little because restarining our kids too much can inadvertently lead to our children marching to someone elses drum. It is sad IF the white children were't mocked and or criticized for expressing themselves through their hair. I personally think they were both out of the box (looks halloweenish or for what my kids school call a wacky tacky day), however, Miss Ukailah(sorry for the spelling) hair was not crazy in comparison to the little lady with eggs in her pigtails. It was less subtle, but they were both fun.
ReplyDeleteI agree with Kelly, I don't think the Jolly Rancher hairstyle was appropriate for the school setting and neither would the egg hairstyle. School is a place for learning and seeing a child with Jolly Ranchers, eggs or the lilke would be distracting in that type of setting.
ReplyDeleteI was appalled at the teacher's reaction to the Jolly Rancher style and her FB posting. That little girl was being creative and individualistic, and I think that's great! My daughter wore egg-tails to school today because they did an egg hunt at school. They were a hit! I don't think either style is "ghetto"; I find that offensive. I only do "funky" hairstyles on my daughter on special occasions/ holidays, and her friends and teachers always love them. It's a very sad day when our educators can't recognize and encourage our children's creativity and self-expression.
ReplyDeleteI think that both are very appropriate hairstyles for kids. I dont think it matters if they wear the hairstyle to school or to any other event. Why should it matter where she wore the hair do to?! Does anybody really change their hair for every single place you go during the day?, thats ridiculous! I think that this teacher is most definitly in the wrong. If I were in this situation I most definitly would have had more than a harsh word or two with that teacher.
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, If I had been that girls mother I would be in jail right now, and I wouldnt have draged the media into it. Second, after I got finished with that teacher should would be wishing she never said a thing! Teachers shouldnt be talking/ridiculing any child, in any form and dang sure shouldnt be taking pictures and posting them on facebook. ARE YOU SERIOUS! Teachers should keep their opinions to themselves!
ReplyDeleteNow, I really dont see the difference in the eggs/candies vs big plastic hairbows, they could both cause distractment in the classroom, heck even those giant hairbows I see on some of this little girls,beads,etc... could be distracting to children who arent used to seeing that kind of stuff in hair, so its kind of ridicolous to be saying that the candy was distracting...everything is distracting to kids, thats just how the learn and teachers should know how to handle a child being distracted, without making a big deal.
I do agree that there should be boundries as to what you send you kid to school in. I personally wouldnt have sent my daughter to school with eggs or really jolly ranchers, because I would be afraid the other kids would be begging for a piece of candy. If I was going to use eggs/candies I would have added them to hairbow some how to make them look more like a actual hair accessory.
I think the problem with the Jolly ranchers is the fact that its a food to be eatin, not worn and people just cant get passed it. I agree its a tad odd to use candies/food in hair, but hey if thats what she wanted who are we to say! I personally believe that the word "GHETTO" should never ever be used when talking about a child. and I really dont see how useing jolly ranchers in hair is "ghetto".
I agree with Barbara. I dont' see a problem with either hairstyle. I allow my daughter to wear different hairstyles to school and it's no different if she has all black cornrows or purple and black like she has now. It's not a major crime to do this! I think people need to lighten up!
ReplyDeleteA. I hope that teacher gets fired. Mocking a student by taking a picture of her and then posting it on FB is just... so cruely insensitive that I can't see her being empathetic of student's needs. That type of insensitivity towards a child means that the person can't be an effective teacher to most children, period.
ReplyDeleteB. OMG, the number of things that parents think are "distractions" in school is just multiplying like (Easter!) bunnies. As someone before said, it's not like the child was passing out Jolly Ranchers! The issue was NEVER that the class was distracted by the candy, and ALWAYS that the teacher thought that the hairstyle was unbelievable. You know, it seems like it's the ADULTS who are getting distracted from the children's lessons, rather than the children.
I did the Egg Style today on my 3.5yr old little black girl and we both love it!!! And will be doing it again Saturday for the Easter Egg Hunts we are attending! I think the idea of the candy style is cute too, I would never say either of these are more ghetto than the next. We are talking about our children here!
ReplyDeleteI'm a teacher and the teacher was obviously WRONG with a capital W. It is never acceptable to post a child's photo online without permission from that child's parent. And it's defnitely not appropriate to comment in an online setting about a child in a negative way. Teachers are human and we all complain and say things about kids that we wish we wouldn't have said, a lot of times out of frustration. But putting it in writing and online is beyond the scope of allowing for that. That said, I honestly don't think either hairstyle is appropriate for school. You will probably spend 15 minutes of your day teaching the rest of the children not to discuss or to try to touch the hairstyle. And that doesn't even take into account the child and her own ability to appropriately manage the hairstyle. Yes, some kids could handle it. Other would be touching it, clacking the candy together, etc. all day long. I once had a girl wear socks with jingle bells on them fairly often. It was one of those things that there was no intention of it being a distraction but oh my goodness, it drove me batty because every time she moved her feet jingled. And she was one of those kids who liked to make her feet move just to hear them jingle. But nevertheless, I didn't tell all my teacher friends, post it online, or even say anything to the parent because it seemed like a silly thing to complain about. I figured that even though it annoyed me and there were a few times where I thought it might have been a distraction for her, it was not distracting for others in the class that I could notice so I let it go. If she had worn them every day and every day I had to give reminders, then maybe that would have been different. Obviously, choosing a hair style like that to wear outside of the school setting is a whole different story and I have no concerns about how someone chooses to style their child's hair in that setting. With school it is different as it affects not just the child but the whole class dynamic. Trust me; I've taught first grade for aobut 7 years and I can't even cut my hair or get highlights without it becoming a 15 minute detour at some point in the day!
ReplyDeletePersonally, when I look at the jolly ranchers and eggs I don't think ghetto or "hey that's nice on a white girl." I don't care for either style. But that's just me. I like "pretties" (that's what my daughter calls them) to be more understated. I love my daughters hair and I want the focus to be her hair not the accessory. When I look at the pictures of the eggs or jolly ranchers I see only the accessories and not the hair.
ReplyDeleteIn response to amber.hope I do in fact style my hair depending on where I'm going. My hair is big and curly, and I wear a variation of styles from fro-hawks to flat ironed straight hair. I could never see myself wearing some of my funkier hairstyles to say, a wedding. But date night with the hubby or handing out with my friends I'd wear it wild and out of control. The same goes with my children. BUT I would never impose my outlook on anyone else. That little girl wanted to wear jolly ranchers and her mother allowed it. That's their business and not for the judgment of anyone else. Especially the teacher. Same with the eggs. Obviously we all have our opinions, but at the end of the day the only children you can (and SHOULD) tend to is your own. As mothers we should hesitate before ridiculing someone else's child because we know we'd be pissed if someone did it to ours.
ReplyDeleteThere probably is a double standard, as there is for most things. Neither hairstyle really tickles my fancy. As far as those saying neither is an appropriate style for school, if I recall the jolly rancher 'do was for picture day at school, does that make a difference? Maybe a bit. All the kids are dressed up in clothes with hair styled in a different way on picture day, as far as my recollection of old school picture days.
ReplyDeleteIts just hair people!! Its not a racial statement. Little girls of all sizes, races & walks of life want to feel beautiful. My daughter is 4 and wants her hair to be blue. So yes on special occasions, I have allowed her to have blue gel in her hair. There is so many other things that we should be worried about when raising our daughters these days. The teacher who was upset about Jolly Ranchers, should probably spend her time focusing on more important educational matters. She could have even made the girls adorable hair style into a learning education, instead of turning it to a humiliating situation. She may never know the impact of her actions. I put the Easter eggs in my daughters hair, and she loved it. She felt special and proud. There are so many other things that we should worry about in the world we live in, like I said. Its just hair.
ReplyDeleteThe only thing I could see as being an issue is having actual food in a child's hair vs. what amounts to as a toy. I personally don't care for either hairstyle, however, couldn't imagine posting a picture of a child (regardless of reason) on the internet without consent of the parent.
ReplyDeleteI agree we need to foster our child's individuality and expressionism, but we also need to teach appropriateness. I have a rule in my house that when there is a special event or we're going somewhere special, I get to choose how my daughter has her hair done and what she will wear (I do ask her to give her opinion and, best case scenario, we agree on something) but when we're just going to the park or hanging around, she chooses what she wears and how her hair is done.
I think that there is a double standard, but I also think sometimes it goes the other way as well. I have always loved hairstyles from different cultures. Love doing braids and cornrows but sometimes, being that we are mostly white, people think it is wrong to do those styles for white people. I personally think that hairtyling it a form of expression and all cultures and creations are awesome.
ReplyDeleteIt is sad that there are people from both sides that see things other wise. As for the Jolly Rancher style, they are little kids, it was cute, people need to get a grip lol. The teacher was wrong in posting and I don't see anything wrong with the style. Just my thoughts :)
Brianna
www.girlscurls.blogspot.com
The teacher had no right to cut the little girls hair. And if that was my child the teacher would really pay what she did and if the little girl wants a white doll let her get it. This is a free country and she should be able to play with any toy she likes if its safe and appropiate.
ReplyDeleteI'm a teacher and some of the hair styles that I get at the K,1,2 level are very grown on my opinion. As a matter of fact I comb hair everyday because some parents don't. I would not have had a negative reaction to either style,I like the creativity and uniqeness. As another person stated I would have turned it into a teachable moment not hurting that childs feelings. I'm actually embarrassed as an educator to know the lack of professionalism that took place. smh
ReplyDeleteI myself am a white girl and the mother of a little white girl and if I ever heard of a teacher insult a black white or purple colored child for any reason I would be disgusted. I would be sure to use my intellect in such a way as to make sure they felt just as embarrassed as they should feel. People are totally missing the most important thing of all... these kids should be given a badge of honor for being so brave and daring. This is creativity at its best. Most kids want to wear what ever the other kids wear and wont even wear something cute if they haven't seen other kids or Disney kids wearing something similar. Today kids have so many terrible female influences. Why wouldn't we celebrate such courage? This is who I want my 9 year old to look up to.
ReplyDeleteAll mothers who say it is inappropriate .... inappropriate is letting your little girl dress up like lady ga ga for halloween not letting them be creative with their hair for picture day and if you don't like candy in the hair... don't put it in yours. For some moms picture day isn't about having the expensive clothing and a perfectly faked smile. For some of us its about remembering how wonderful our little child is at that moment in her life. What a great memory to have. "Remember your first grade picture?" "When we put the candies at the end of your braids." That is what this is about. Hopefully that teacher didn't spoil it too much for her. She deserves an appology from the teach. Are they sure she ment it to be insulting though? Maybe she posted it cause she thought it was cute?